Welcome to Monday Morning Men

SPEAKER_00 0:26

Welcome back to the Monday Morning Men podcast. My name is Josh Swart and I am here with Thomas Dellinger. We're coming at you on a beautiful Monday morning. Um I'm a little distracted. Oh, are you? Yeah, you're you're in a tank top. This is the least like I'm just glad you have a shirt on at this point.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

There's very little cleavage though, so we're okay, guys.

SPEAKER_00 0:51

Eyes are up here, Josh. We were we were on a uh spear fishing trip a couple months ago, and you had a tank top on or something, and like the side kept opening up.

SPEAKER_01 1:01

A little little bit of uh my nipple showing. Yes. That's not happening today. Man, we are starting this one off real spiritual.

SPEAKER_00 1:08

So I'm just glad this one is full coverage.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

Just know, guys, we are real people. Do you want me to start over? Let's go with it. We're going with it. Um, it's gonna be a great segue into what we're talking about. Really? No, it's this is great.

SPEAKER_00 1:23

That's awesome. I love it. Um, guys, give us give us uh we we show this out every week. Info at mondaymorningmen.com. Um, if you got topics that you want us to cover, if you got feedback, prayer requests, whatever it is, reach out to us there. Um with that, you ready to roll? Let's do it. Let's go for it. What are you talking about today?

SPEAKER_01 1:41

All right,

Why Christian Leaders Keep Getting Exposed

SPEAKER_01 1:42

so uh funny, it was I I knew I was gonna um talk about this obviously this morning as I was driving over here, but I uh it popped up on my my feed, I guess, yesterday, and I'm meant to listen to it. So I was listening to it on the way here. Um John and Corey Cooper, who are the uh lead, I guess, singers or founders, skillet, which I mean that's just bringing that back up from my childhood. They were so good. They're still doing it, they're still doing it, and they seem to be one of the few um uh people kind of in that industry that seem to be faithful to Jesus. Anyway, they were talking about this whole uh NAR movement and just kind of this exposure culture, which we've talked about. I think it was in our episode of uh Sound Doctrine and and kind of referenced that. Sure. We're actually gonna get into um a certain passage of scripture in regards to qualifications of leadership, and we're gonna talk about how it applies to us. Because remember, we're recording this, something that you can practice Monday. Well, hopefully the rest of your life, but it's an idea we give you something on Monday to practice throughout the week to kind of grow in. And as I'm listening to this, it ties right into what we're gonna be in, which is Titus 1.6, of what God calls us to. And we see an epidemic in the Christian church of kind of what's going on because leaders are unqualified, we're not holding them to the standard of the qualifications that are found in scripture, and we're paying the consequences. It's funny, like it's not funny, but I guess ironic. I I even watched um I'm a big documentary guy, and so uh Netflix has just come out with uh it's called The Pastor's Wife. And so I have been waiting for it to come out. Like, I'm that guy. Like a documentary is like people should watch this. So I'm like, I don't know, but let me know if there's a good doc. And I like kind of those true crime, like real life documentaries. I like historical too, but those are my thing. And it's funny because I I couldn't have been more probably than 20 minutes into this, and I was like, the fact that this church is surprised or that all this happened, I'm like, you can call this a mile away just by simply the fact that this man was unqualified even before the bad stuff came out, or even just a little bit of sin in his life. Like he immediately should have been removed from leadership. Right now you've got a crazy large problem. If we simply

Why Titus Still Challenges Us Today

SPEAKER_01 4:00

just follow the scriptures and walked in obedience, our lives would just become so much better. Our churches would become so much healthier. And yet we choose, and I don't mean this just as our leaders or our our our churches, even for myself, if I chose to walk in obedience, life would be so much better. So, in that, we're in Titus, and I just want to kind of give you guys a quick overview uh uh of Titus. So, one thing I I I've said this to people before um, Titus, 1 Timothy, 2 Timothy, 1st and 2 Corinthians are all written to Greeks. You know, Timothy was in Ephesus, Titus is in Crete, obviously Corinthians is in Corinth. Those books of the Bible, and you'll notice a lot of preachers don't like to especially preach through them, they'll preach passages, but they kind of avoid them. And the reason is because they're so counter-cultural. If you listen to ironically, these kind of like apostles these days, and I'm not saying they're completely wrong, but there's this idea of end times and America or we're dealing with Babylon and all these things, there is an element of truth to that. But when it comes to American culture and the way that we live our lives right now, I believe those books, specifically the Greeks, were kind of the first subculture that like uh they didn't worry about like like the Babylonians, or you know, you've got the Persians and the Romans, it's all about conquering and, you know, looting and and taking and dominating and taking all the treasure and the gold. The Greeks were about individualism, which is what America is about, your pursuit of happiness, your best life now. So when it comes to Paul addressing cultural issues, there are some things, and I would encourage you, if you read those books that are going to make you uncomfortable, that you're like, oh, I don't know if I agree with that. And it's funny, I will listen to people on Twitter that will trash Paul, these quote unquote pastors. Well, here's where Paul got it wrong, and we don't believe this. And like obviously, they're uh of a mindset that's ungodly, and there's obviously other issues there, but they will all you rarely hear them say that about Jesus. You'll rarely hear them address other books of the Bible, but those because it's so counter-cultural to us. So if you, I would encourage you to read First Timothy, 2 Timothy, Titus, and and and first and 2nd Corinthians, and it would challenge you on that. But you need to understand what's happening. You have this Greek culture that's so unhealthy that Paul says, all right, here's what we're gonna do. God works in the practical, which is one way this podcast is. I'm gonna set practical leadership up. It's gonna help shepherd you. Here's what the leaders need to be to be qualified. And then in chapter two, he's like, and this is the standard they're also gonna hold you to. And then in chapter three, he gets into this beautiful thing where it's like, look, you can walk this way, but at the end of

What Does “Blameless” Actually Mean?

SPEAKER_01 6:37

the day, just know it doesn't save you. It's the power of the gospel, which is beautiful. Yeah. So in that, we need to understand we have a cultural issue, and part of that is like, even you can see it in the church, we're not holding people to a standard that God has asked to ask of us. And uh specifically in verse six, which is where we're gonna be, it talks about what they need to be as a qualified leader or shepherd or elder of your church. And I'm not gonna get into all those things, I'm not gonna sit there, but we need to remember you're like, well, I'm not a leader and elder, so how does this apply? We should be mimicking them. Yeah, we don't have the consequences. If we fail on some of these qualifications, we're not removed from our job. Right. Your pastor will be. So his consequences are larger, but we should be trying to mimic these behaviors. And this is uh verse six. It says, if a man is blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children, not accused of disobedience or unruly behaviors, kind of how that's defined, wild or disobedient. I want to focus on the first part. He needs to be blameless. Um, I prefer the translation I just read out of the New King James, but you can read, um, I actually prefer the NIV in this one. It says an elder must be blameless. And that's the word we're gonna kind of talk about. And that's if we had to put a title on this episode, is Are You Blameless? So, in that, blameless, the that specific word there in the Greek is actually only mentioned one time in the New Testament. However, if you jump back again to 1 Timothy, so you can see Paul has a cultural issue with with the Greeks. Uh, 1 Timothy 3 2, even though it doesn't use this exact Greek word Greek word, most theologians make it synonymous. He actually puts in there when Timothy's giving this elder must be blameless, they say above reproach, and that's what it means. They need to be above reproach. I personally like that definition a little bit better than just blameless because that can be ambiguous. But you need to be above reproach. So, what does it mean to be above reproach or blameless? Um, I really like the way that George Knight breaks it down this uh and is in his book, The Pastoral Epistles. It says this that they're not open to attack or criticism. He's not objectively chargeable. He is not one who makes a practice of dancing around the fine line of

Slander vs. Legitimate Accusations

SPEAKER_01 8:58

righteous reproach. Above reproach is kind of, I think most of us would understand that, but the reality is, is there's this um we need to be so far uh uh above that line that this is should be not should not carry any sort of weight. And I just want to break down a few thoughts before we get into kind of some practical application. If you live in an environment, and I don't care what denomination you're in, there's this a lot of church leaders like to talk about slander. Slander, by the way, is lies that I'm telling about you, not half truths, not some truth, and my exaggeration. It's just false and made up. And they're like, Well, we're being slandered for the gospel. And I'm like, bro, you actually did it. Like, I don't, that's not slander, that's consequences and that's truth. Slander would be what Jesus went through when he was actually in front of the Pharisees before he went to the cross. It says that they brought charges against them, but none of them stood or held weight, and they just were making stuff up, and even they knew the the Pharisees who were trying to accuse him were like, it's just not true. There's just no water to it. Yeah. I actually had someone I'm very close to have this happen. And the wife of the pastor was accused of having a fare at the church, and I loved the response from the wife. It wasn't, I'm suffering for the gospel. Oh, I'm being accused, they're out to attack me. It's a demonic attack, and other things. Just said two things. Prove it. Okay, prove it. Like, it's so ridiculous. Yeah. That's the craziest. If I if I looked at you and I was like, hey guys, Josh Sport's a serial killer, you'd be like, what? Like, what? Like, it's so ridiculous to even consider.

SPEAKER_00 10:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:48

And yet we will we'll co-marry these two with men that are actually doing certain things. Well, we only did it one time, or it's well, you're it's just your interpretation of it. It's like you need to be above reproach so far to the other line that it doesn't hold any merit or water. It just doesn't. In that, I had a buddy that was kind of going through this, and one of the the the uh apostle of the church or whatever, that's a whole nother conversation, was was being accused of some things. And this guy I knew said, Well, some of these people that are saying this are hurt by the church, they don't like him, they're angry at him, they're all you know, they're accusing him of some things that may or may not be true. And I looked at him and I said, Look, that actually may be valid, right? There may be some element of what you said is true. And and you'd be like, But you know, we always have that phrase, don't throw the baby out with a bath water. It's like, but there's water in that tub for a reason. Yeah. So I'm like, there is some merit to what is being said, and you're no longer blameless.

Find the Truth in the Accusation

SPEAKER_01 11:48

So this isn't it like, well, it needs to be 100% true of everything that you said about me. My dad always said, find the 10% that they're true that they're spreading about you, even if the 90% are lies, and you need to work on that. When you are blameless as a leader, or if you're a man listening to this, you need to be above reproach where it just doesn't hold any water. When your wife looks at you and she's like, Hey, like my wife and I were having a discussion last night. She's like, I don't feel emotionally connected to you. And I'm sitting there, I'm like, What? I'm like, I pour out my life for you every day, right? And it feels unmerited when she says something like that to me, but there is an element of truth to it. Yeah. Let's just be real. Yeah. And because there's an element of truth, then I need to go, I need to ensure that I am above that reproach in every capacity, that I go so far on the other side. That should be the way that we live our lives, and that's the way our leaders should be. It should be so outlandish when people accuse us of certain things. And we live in a day where it's like, well, this is exposure culture, which is a crazy thing to say, which I'm like, yeah, they're exposing your stuff. Like a lying culture would make more sense than to actually say as an exposing, exposing culture. And then it's like, even if they're 50% wrong, there's 50%

What Are You Putting Before Your Eyes?

SPEAKER_01 13:04

that we need to work on. So, in that, let's get into just kind of some application. If we believe that we're so far and we need to be on the right, in the sense of like nobody can even bring something up against you. Here's a couple of things, and a couple of things that I would like to encourage you to practice this week. I had a buddy of mine who was at a church and I respected the heck out of this. He posted on Facebook and he said, I would like to publicly apologize. And here's the beautiful thing he said, I went to a movie at the movie theater tonight with my wife, and and the movie in and of itself was probably not like the worst movie, but he's like, Some things happened. And he they ended up walking out, but he believed that he should have walked out earlier. And his reason for apologizing was like he didn't sin by by you know engaging in it or thinking. He said, My concern is that people from my church saw me go into this movie. And he said, I want you to know I'm not okay with that. That is a man that wants to live above reproach and that they can't look at him and be like, Well, you're indulging and you're engaging in that. So if we're asking this, our let's just start right there. If we're asking ourselves, are we blameless? Here's a question for you. What are you putting before your eyes? And it's easy to look at that and be like, Well, yeah, I'm not looking at pornography. Praise God. Okay, but are you watching stuff in your home, even with your family, that you're like, we we probably should be watching this? Are you above reproach that you're living a blameless, righteous life where it's like nobody has anything to stand against it? Just even the example I just gave you. Are you above reproach even the way that you talk to your wife? You're like, Well, I'm not abusive and I'm not screaming at her. Good. But are you treating her with kindness and respect?

Are You Above Reproach at Home and Work?

SPEAKER_01 14:46

Yeah. If someone were to say, hey, you treat your wife poorly, is that does that have a little bit of merit? Are you above reproach and living a blameless life? You when we think of this, we think of extremisms like that Netflix documentary or the pastor that's stealing or having affairs. And yes, while true, there are just simple things that we're not living above reproach for. The way we treat our wife, the way we treat our kids, the way we treat our neighbors, the way we treat our customers, the people in our work, the what we watch, do you live like the world, even in your pursuit of if you're listening to this and you're in the marketplace, are you in you know, engaging in selfish ambition? This is about me making as much money. This is about me and my success and how I'm presented to people. All these things are unhealthy environments. If I looked at your life, do I go, oh my goodness, this guy is a Christian businessman, but I said it without disdain, but actually as a righteous, blameless. I can't tell you how many times I've been told by people, it's like, I don't even hire Christian contractors because they take advantage. And it's like, yeah, I've had that happen. What if it was the complete opposite? Where it's like, I you live a such a righteous life, a blameless life that I want to engage in who you are. Yeah. So in that, remember that our culture is very similar to the Greeks. Paul is addressing with Titus, it needs to get out.

Nothing to Hide

SPEAKER_01 16:11

Even in that subculture of your best life now, which is so unhealthy. Remember, even in your application, that that needs to be attacked, and we need to remove ourselves so far from it, we're above reproach. And I'm gonna leave you with a couple of my favorite guys. We've quoted these guys many times, but I just want to leave you with these as you think about am I live living a blameless life? We'll go with John MacArthur first. It says this to be blameless means to have no accusation successfully brought against you. Doesn't mean you're not accused. So for all you NAR guys out there, it's like, oh, they're accusing. Yeah, Jesus was accused, everybody's accused, but it's successfully brought against you. Unfortunately, we're having a lot of success bringing stuff against people. It does not mean sinless perfection, but that the leader's life is of such integrity that no one can rightfully charge him with an unexamined or unconfessed sin. Charles Spurgeon says a man's life must be you can't even attack him. That's how he defines it. Like you can't even bring something against him. If his character can be pierced by errors or just scandal, he is unfit to lead the army of God. If you're able to penetrate that armor, you shouldn't be in leadership. AW Tozer, a true leader is one who has nothing to hide. You're a leader of your family, dad. Do you have something to hide? His life is transparent and his public ministry is backed by a private life that fears no exposure. You're like, I'm not in church leadership. Nope, but you're a leader in your business, you're a leader of your family, of your marriage. Are you living a transparent life that if I were to walk in your home and see how you acted with your kids and your wife, are you blameless? Final thought from Tim Keller. Being blameless means your life is wholly consistent with the message you preach. Hypocrisy is leadership. Hypocrisy and leadership create cynics. Integrity creates disciples. You want to create disciples in your own family with your kids.

Integrity Creates Disciples

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Quit saying something at church and acting a certain way and leading a life differently Monday through Saturday. That's why this podcast exists. We want to see you practicing your faith throughout the week so that we're not living in hypocrisy and we're living a blameless life before Jesus. Those are my thoughts.

SPEAKER_00 18:21

Yeah, that's good. I don't think that looking at the requirements for elders or leaders in the church is something that's like unobtainable. Like I think it's a great standard for everybody to live. Everybody, you know. Um I don't I I don't know if I'm called to be an elder leader, but you know, I want to be blameless. Yeah. I remember there was a youth pastor that I had that one of the analogies that he had, he's like, he drew a line and he's like, walking blameless is not like walking next to this line where you can easily like cross over. It's like running in the other direction, you know, staying away from

Stop Flirting With the Line

SPEAKER_00 19:03

the appearance of evil, staying away from anything that could associate you with like not being blameless, right? So I think a lot of us flirt with that line uh in our in our choices each day, and it's it's a good charge for us to not do that.

SPEAKER_01 19:22

Flip always says he's like, uh he's like there's a fence between evil and good. And he's like, but you gotta remember Satan owns the fence. And like that's the thing. We think God owns the fence and God owns the line. But he's like, if you approach it as if Satan owns the fence, you you're a lot different. Yeah. And your response, yeah, yeah, I'm I have zero desire to ever be in church leadership. I have less than one. Um, but that doesn't mean that those qualifications are, I'm still not called to them, right? When he gives these qualifications in scripture, it's not like, hey, these guys are called to this, you're not. It's saying that if they step outside of those lines, the consequences are are greater. Not that we shouldn't. So as you read whether it's 1 Timothy 3 or Titus, realize you're called to that. It may not be church leadership, but you are called to live a blameless life. Yeah. And this is this is what you got to do.

SPEAKER_00 20:09

So yeah, that's a good point. Good look at awesome. Guys, thanks for listening. Um, we will see you next week.